Best idea ever since gas prices are low right now and people are idiots and pouring all of their demand into SUV’s and lowering the prices of substitutes like fuel efficient vehicles and and I have a degree in economics and see all kinds of evidence of consumer behavior douchery?
Worst idea ever - Maybe I’m the douchey consumer this time?
Dad would have been 20 years sober today, assuming that he remained living and didn’t take a drink over the past 7 months and 12 days.
If he were here, I would have sent him a card telling him how proud I was of him. How I knew it wasn’t easy to do what he did. We would have joked together that one year from today, his sobriety would be able to buy booze.
In 2001, the year before I moved to Tulsa, we made a big deal about it. It was the same day the American Airlines flight crashed in New York City, which would have been a big sad deal if the plane hadn’t been full of non-Americans and we weren’t so relieved for it not to have been terrorism. Still, we were still feeling a little precarious so we got two very rich chocolate cakes and Dad, my brother, my brother’s friend, a few of my friends, and a friend of Dad’s got together and ate as much of them and other snacks as we could. We just celebrated our family, and Dad’s resolve in particular.
Big bump on head. No trip to doctor, based on judgement of daycare assistant director.
Veteran parents: Any signs to watch out for in a 20 month old? Seems like if she’s not fussy or throwing up and is acting like herself she’s probably fine? And if she gets a headache she’ll cry to let us know?
My brother received a call that Dad was still alive and in some sort of hospital or nursing home. We went to see him and he was pretty out of it and was needing full time care. We asked the staff what was up, we thought he was dead since April. They said there was some sort of mix up at Southwest Medical Center and the cremation place - they didn’t really check to make sure he was dead and they cremated another body and mistakenly told us it was Dad’s. He ended up somehow at another hospital and the staff had been trying to get in touch with us for 7 months. Dad talked with us and I said something like it was a pretty good April Fools joke. And he talked about other stuff too. He seemed pretty happy with us.
Turns out it was just some sort of fraud - these people at the hospital had created a creature that looked and acted like Dad. They were using predictive analytics software (like my company makes!) to somehow forecast what Dad would have been saying to us in this situation and how we would best relate to him. These people said that he needed full time care just so they could take all of the money in the estate for his care. My brother and I sleuth-fully got proof and told the police. The hospital folks got arrested. And Dad was still dead. And I guess it turned out I was relieved that he was still dead because I didn’t want to take care of him in this condition.
My interpretation: The night before Dad died unexpectedly, I was watching a special on health insurance and the cost of keeping old people alive and taking care of people with alzheimers and stuff and I thought OH GOD I NEVER WANT TO HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF DAD. I feel responsible for his death. I know it wasn’t karma or anything but I worry that this feeling was present in my voice or actions to him while he was alive, and wonder if he would have taken better care of himself if he hadn’t sensed my dread of acting as a caregiver.
Awesome sermon. Taken as a whole, it is not male-bashing at all. A LOT of really good stuff about how different brains work and how each type of brain can frustrate the other type.
This explains about 99% of the frustration I’ve ever felt with my husband and 99% of the apprehension I have about traveling across the country for several days with a baby. I guess the key is to finding:
A way that everything gets done when it is supposed to get done
A relatively equal distribution of tasks between partners
A common definition of what “done” is
Remembering without being reminded that it needs to be done
Assurances that if something doesn’t get done by one person that the other person won’t have to become responsible for it
Remembering that whenever you decide to do your share is fine. One can’t judge the other for being neurotic - the other can’t judge the other for appearing “lazy”.
A friend of mine from church lost her 5 year old in a car accident. A girl I lived next door to as a kid lost her sister. A friend from high school lost his mother. A student in my high school and his mother burned to death in one. Even when I just hear about one on the news such as the big pileup on the Oklahoma Turnpike this summer, I feel pretty low until something else fills that part of my brain. It pretty much ruined my mood on our Chicago trip.
I went to an awesome women’s group at church last night. It was our first meeting. I’m usually pretty meh about girls-only time but I really hit it off with these people. I was feeling good about the balance in my life and was feeling the least amount of stress I had felt in weeks.
Then my usual route home was blocked due to flashing red lights. I tried coming at the intersection from another direction. Also blocked. I went down a mile and turned around to catch the far southern edge of the intersection. The wreck that had happened there was pretty bad. Lots of people standing around with concerned looks on their faces. I was pretty sure it was a fatality accident, and this was confirmed on our local morning news today.
I drive through this intersection every day - It’s a fairly mild, four-lane plus center turn lane traffic light controlled intersection. It’s less than a mile from where we live. I didn’t know the guy who died. But it’s just had me down most of the day after the brief moment of relaxation I was feeling at church last night. Fragility of life and all that.
Not directed at anyone here, though a post reminded me of it.
I always get angry at people who suggest that women thank their husbands for making an effort around the house.
To me, routinely thanking someone implies that they have gone above and beyond what they are expected to do. If you’re supposed to be splitting household tasks 50/50, why should I be thanking somebody if they finally decide to try doing 10%?
Both of you routinely thank each other for the tasks that you do. This is polite.
You are a stay-at-home wife or otherwise have claimed housework as your job.
I seriously have so much anger and resentment in my bank of feelings right now. There are so many people in my life who don’t notice or appreciate anything. People who think they are too good to do their share. People who can’t see anything from any other point of view. People who don’t realize when I’m overwhelmed. People who expect things from me when when they know I’m overwhelmed. People who ask if there’s something they can do and are already thinking about something else by the time they finish asking the question. People who ask if there’s something they can do because it’s much less work on their part than just doing something.
All weekend, the only time I felt like I had for myself was the 30 minutes I cross stitched. Oh, and the five minutes a day I was in the shower.
I’m working on volunteer stuff at 10:45p.m. - in what used to be the middle of the night for me. Any sort of activity that is not related to washing dishes, paying bills, reading to/playing with Emerson, cooking, making sure Em doesn’t choke at dinner, doing her laundry, and changing her diapers gets relegated to her nap time or to after she goes to bed. And these activities are numerous.